To Judge Or Not To Judge

So far, I have only told 3 friends and my kids about this blog. Why? I think I am a bit afraid that people won’t like it, won’t connect or find it remotely interesting. Am I afraid of being judged!

Are we all afraid of judgement? Do we all judge others? Yes, and yes. Judgement from others is unavoidable and we can’t control it, but we can stop it negatively impacting our lives and we can learn to be less judgemental ourselves.

During my hypnotherapy training we were taught how best to build rapport. How initial impressions are so important as we hope people will trust us so that we can help them deal with any challenges.

Initial impressions can be made within seconds and are based on how we look physically, what we wear, our facial expressions and what we say. Our subconscious has a lot to do with this. We are more drawn to those we believe share the same values and interests. We each have our own internal morals and personalities built on the lives we have lived.

Rapport comes from connecting with a person and forming a relationship built on understanding their feelings and ideals. It is built through communication and trust.

But that doesn’t explain why I haven’t told people that know me, about this blog. They have already made their impressions about me, and they have known me for a long time. And if I am worried, they may judge me, why I am sharing my thoughts on such a public platform where inevitably I will be negatively judged by strangers at some point.

Maybe it’s about people knowing me as a whole person. The severity of my anxiety, the gory details about my depression. The losses I have had in my life and how these affected me? And how people will think of me as a mum whose daughter had such severe mental health challenges she was admitted to a psychiatric hospital?

How am I going to feel if someone judges me? Probably not good for a minute, but I will try not to take it personally. Everyone is entitled to their thoughts and opinions.  I just hope people offer constructive feedback, negative and positive and won’t just be mean because they don’t understand.  

If I post anything that needs clarification, please ask.

If you want to ask me a question, please do that.

Instead of being judgmental let’s take a minute… ask questions … be more compassionate … everyone has their own story … and as the saying goes, you never know what anyone is dealing with, so please be kind to each other.


4 thoughts on “To Judge Or Not To Judge

  1. Hi! Thanks for sharing! I’m the same, I have shared my blog with only two friends and with my sibling. I also feel I have to be careful referring to my love life in the blog or to any negative thoughts I’ve had that would upset my family. It’s a trade-off between privacy and raising of awareness about mental health and related topics. I can totally relate to your post today as I try to reach out to others in a way that feels natural to me.


  2. I love this Helen ❤️
    After knowing you for 10 years nearly this leap you are taking is amazing! I love reading your blog and the updates you have helped me no end and been nothing but a beautiful friend xxx


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